Fortune Cookies

Monday, April 2, 2012: I had a wonderful, relaxing, spiritual, cup-filled-to-overflowing weekend. The wind blew hard most of the time, so I stayed hunkered down in my comfy house to watch conference and be guided and motivated and lifted and strengthened by the Spirit. I feel TONS better today than I did last Friday night, when I crawled into bed exhausted from the visit with Dr. Scaife and all the decisions made. I'm at peace with my life and eager to get onto the next phase, whatever that may be.

I did have to go back to Huntsman today to get more blood work done. (Long story short, the trial study clinic where my blood was being shipped for the evaluation process was closed Friday & Monday to deliveries, so had to overnight NEW blood to arrive there in the morning.) My favorite phlebotomist, Kirk, was there to do his magic. He wrapped a warm hospital blanket around my left arm for about five minutes and then went in for one stick that filled up about five little vials with my good blood. Bless him! Jennifer, my trial counselor, was there to make sure he got all the paperwork, and as I finished, she gave me some good news. She said that even without these blood samples, the trial clinic let her know that "things look good" for me to be accepted into the study. Then, she said that she would probably be calling me in the next couple of days with the results of the randomization. I was pleasantly surprised that things were moving more quickly than we thought they might. Keep it up, guys! I'm anxious to get some solid dates scheduled.

We're on Spring Break this week, so J came to the Cancer Center with me. It's the first time she's been there, so it was good for her to visualize where I spend all my time lately. The blood draw was so quick this time, she barely had time to get her approval for the hospital's WiFi on her iPod. As we were leaving the parking lot, she told me once again that she actually likes being in hospitals - that she feels safe there and loves how quiet and peaceful things seem. People are busy, but they're busy doing GOOD. She said she also likes feeling somewhat unique because most of her friends have no idea what goes on in hospitals. I'm glad she feels it's a positive that she knows what she does at her age. It makes me a little sad, but she's okay with it.

Tonight, I finished my application for Social Security Disability benefits. If they only looked at my medical records and history of surgeries & treatments & doctor visits & tests, I'd probably have a good chance of being accepted. But, if they interview my family and friends about whether or not I have the ability and energy to work, I'm afraid it would be declined. Right now, at this moment, I feel great and I do have the energy to work. But, I worry for the future, when I'm spending days and weeks in the hospital recovering from operations or going through treatments, as the bills continue to add up. We'll see what happens. I guess "Stage IV Metastatic Melanoma" is on the list of conditions for which one can apply for Disability benefits, so that's why I'm giving it a go. I worry about not working, so it would be such a blessing if I didn't have to worry about it so much.

We had Chinese food that other night for dinner (when it's J's choice, that's what we can expect). My fortune cookie said, "You will enjoy good health and financial independence." Hallelujah! Let it be...

(Picture: Grammy and Olive, March 2012)